Two events, carried by like themes, fell on the same day yesterday. First the Postimees opinion leaders dinner discussing gender roles this year. And, secondly, University of Tartu applied research centre revealed results of study into views and ways of men in Estonia.
Beholding both together, the two not only amplify but help explain each other. But to see that, one needs to take a closer look.
Speaking at the dinner, academician Richard Villems drew on the differences between chimpanzees and pygmy chimpanzees – not so much about outer features but social behaviour. For the ordinary chimpanzees, community is based on the classic alpha male model, while the pygmies have taken a different path: instead of aggressiveness, there’s the agreement to reach agreements and attempts to solve conflicts ere these erupt. Will this mean the usual ones are macho and the pygmies softy? Not at all. Turns out, in hunting their behaviour differs not. While social values have been added, survival ability has not gone anywhere – rather the opposite.
And now for the Tartu University study. With lots of aspects researched in the male behaviour and judgement, the one most interesting was about values prioritised by guys. Turns out, love is appreciated far above material security, success at work, and being a public figure. Over 63 percent deemed this very important. Home came second, and raising children third on the scale.
Feels like it’s time to topple the stereotypes. Instead of material values, the Estonian man prioritises love, kids and home. What a joy that the overwhelmingly materialistic values characteristic of transition-society have lost some weight.
And now back to the dinner and what Richard Villems was saying: perhaps the time is ripe to clearly differentiate between gender roles and gender stereotypes. The humans are male and female, inevitably. But the stereotypes aren’t. Depending on times and situations, these may differ a whole lot.
Which leads us to the other speaker at opinion-dinner, the writer Kristiina Ehin. The gender roles we diligently try to perform in society at times carry attitudes not worthy of human beings, she said. How apt her related word picture on medieval graves... Though nicely covered by modern housing areas, an excavator in the back yard may dig up quite a load of the past.