Evelyn Kaldoja: weird prejudice – ladies desiring career should give up family

Photo: SCANPIX

A couple of years ago I heard from a female East Asian diplomat that if a lady wants to make a career, it is quite natural for her to give up having a family. Maybe, in their parts, such categorical choices are really considered the norm and being single, thus, was the only option for South Korea’s first lady Park Geun-hye. 

A kind of bigotry, however, seems to prevail, towards ladies-at-the-top, in West as well. Expressed, as if, in the formula «top political job + being single = rare sexual orientation».

Name a female politician and I bet there is a whole bunch of otherwise sensible folk convinced in their homosexuality. So what, if they lack any evidence. So what, if there have been men in their lives in times past. And the numbers of single ladies, successful in politics, being lower than that of men of the same sort.

A US diplomat once surprised me, answering my half-rhetoric question: why such a bright politician as former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice will not run for President, with a wicked tone, saying maybe she was a lesbian and did not want that to come out. Ms Rice not saved from such a «diagnosis» by the fact she used to be engaged, in her youth, with an American footballer, nor the talk of her affections towards the Canadian defence Minister Peter MacKay being more than professional. Evidently, it is only her altogether-female dressing style and the fact of her being on a shopping trip the time hurricane Katrina started, that has made such remarks rarer with her than with many other female politicians.

Sometimes, some sexuality-related aspects may disqualify a person from being a top politician. Dominique Strauss-Kahn, for instance, would have been just as unfit for French President as any other kind of addict. Yet, let us be honest, Mr Strauss-Kahn proved his unfitness with extreme heterosexual activity, rather.

But why should a female president, minister or speaker, living alone, be homosexual – no information available, whatsoever? And why should undeclared sexuality affect state management? We do not expect details on a President’s sex life, from his office… Do we?

Some top female politicians being homosexual cannot, indeed, be ruled out. However, it is much more likely that they just happened not to marry, thus having more time for their careers. Talented and ambitious married women, launching from the same starting point, just fell behind, not having the opportunities to advance available to men and single women.