Editorial: do love the little ones

Postimees
Copy
Please note that the article is more than five years old and belongs to our archive. We do not update the content of the archives, so it may be necessary to consult newer sources.

«What needeth a child? / A home to abide. / A Dad, Mommy dear, to wipe every tear. / As kindness flows free, bad manners will flee.»* A bit of Postimees translation from a poem by Heljo Mänd.

What does the poetess say? Things utterly simple. Before all else, every child needs attention, care and love. The warmth of a home, the loved ones, the family. In today’s newspaper, social ministry vice chancellor Rait Kuuse words it well: the problem lies not in administration of the substitute homes, but in the fact these are still so often needed. To not have places like these at all... that day, of course, will never dawn.

The priority of our policies should be to have social welfare as little needed for kids as at all possible. And when it is needed, the version best for a child should be sought. Indeed, the state may strive, and it does, to have substitute homes as child-friendly as can be (even the move from «children’s home» to «substitute home» is a step towards that), but the aim should rather be to reach the root of the issue, prevent the problems and enhance raising of kids in families.

However well organised, a substitute home is just that – a substitute. The people may be nice, and they usually are, but they can’t take the place of parents. Here, attitudes and values in society do play a role. Jail the crook, and send the troubled kid to a children’s home – till today, the simplified stand somewhat prevails. Desiring to solve the problem, one must dig deep, shape the attitudes.

How important for the state to support those willing to adopt, to serve as caregivers and custodians. This, the society needs the empathy to understand – and never to discourage.

By the very Constitution, parents are provided the right and obligation to raise their children and take care of them. In reality, what we often see is callous disregard towards both. Not limited to avoiding the obligations, some go the «extra mean» mile. At a Mother’s Day conference, Mother of the Year judge Helve Särgava showed a shocking reality – men, avoiding alimony, are themselves drawing state support.

In the current coalition treaty, criticised in many aspects, measures are included to pry the money from hands of avoiders. Hopefully, this will take good effect.

*The original reads: «Mis on lapsel vaja? / Vaja kodumaja. / Kui on ema-isa, kuivab ruttu pisar. / Lahket sõna tahab, siis ta pole paha.»

Comments
Copy
Top